22 Things I’ve Learnt At 22

Today’s my 22nd birthday (eep), so I’ve taken it upon myself to impart some wisdom on the masses. Like Ghandi, except not.
22 things I learnt at 22 |www.whatkumquat.com

  1. Plans are just like Justin Bieber: they can change, and sometimes that’s for the best.
  2. Rice will literally cure 95% of your ailments.
  3. Stop plucking your eyebrows. Also, if you accidentally shave off half your eyebrow whilst trying to re-shape it, do not use the excuse that your razor “slipped from your shower caddy and took off half the brow”. No one will believe you.
  4. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it acceptable to wear crocs. The human race went hundreds of thousands of years without them. I don’t see why you should bring it on yourself to ruin that streak.
  5. Your dad is like a walking Google and the best resource out there, so use him.
  6. The best-kept secret of the Western world is Domino’s pan-fried pizza.
  7. You can save heaps of money by developing the habits of your grandmother and stealing Splenda/tea bags/fruit/cutlery from restaurants, hotels, and airplanes whenever possible.
  8. Being tall is not as bad as you might think. It’s actually rather fun towering over people.
  9. Blue eyeshadow is never a good look.
  10. If you want to post pictures of your coffee and spend 15 minutes trying to get a good angle for a picture of your shoes, do it and to hell with what other people think. You do you, homie.
  11. BUT you should care what your mother thinks. She birthed you and spent 18 years as your free therapist, so I think you owe her a little.
  12. Clear liquor tastes like first year and regrets. Avoid at all costs.
  13. If you’re running late and can only do one thing to fix yourself, put on lipstick. Nothing tricks people into thinking you have your shit together like red lipstick.
  14. Don’t impulse buy a fish. He’s probably going to die and you’re probably going to have several ragrets the second you try to go away for a weekend and realise you have to leave Sparky behind to fend for himself.
  15. You are not Gwyneth Paltrow. Cool it with the green juices and have a pasta.
  16. Similarly, maybe rapping is not your calling. It’s ok.
  17. If you have even the faintest idea that you want to do something, then do it. A few years from now you’ll be wishing you had started earlier.
  18. Cleaning is very therapeutic. I’m aware this sounds like something your mother would say to get you to clean the house, sneaky minx that she is, but it’s true.
  19. Find a tacky cat sweater at Goodwill and protect it with your life, it will be one of your favourite possessions.
  20. You do like coffee, trust me.
  21. When in doubt, go to sleep.
  22. Always make an effort to look presentable, on the rare chance that you run into Meryl Streep in the produce aisle. Do you really want your profile picture/Linked In headshot/Instagram to be of the Queen of Humankind and you wearing sweatpants with your hair looking like something recently took shelter in it?

8 Comments

  1. Stealing cutlery from restaurants?! Woah…lol I don’t know if I’d ever do that, but I guess it does save money. XO, Sarah | http://www.thebellainsider.com/ | https://www.instagram.com/sarah_thebella/

  2. allisonarnone

    Great list! Happy birthday!

  3. I love tip number 10 and 22! Meryl Streep is one of my favourite actress! I hope that if I do ever meet her, I pray that I look like the Queen of humankind lol!

  4. lol @ no crocs – I second that! Also, yes leave your brows alone! I’ll be 27 this month and definitely still regretting that one!

    Happy 22nd Birthday to you Elly! Hope it’s a great time!

    • Thanks Tianna! And yeah still waitin on half of one of my eyebrows to grow back after I got too confident in my cosmetic abilities post-watching beauty vids on Youtube a few years ago haha xx

  5. Haaaappy birthday! Those are some amazing tips! Haha. My nana also took all the soaps/random items from places she visited! No shame.

TALK BACK

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.